Remembering dad, three years later

 August 28th was the third anniversary of my dad's death. It was a very sad time when he died. Time since then feels as if it stretches and contracts, much like a rubber band. Sometimes, it seems as if the three years was a long time. Other times, it seems as if my dad passed away yesterday. When my dad, whose name was Roy, died, it was challenging for me to believe that he was gone. Over time, the shock of losing dad has lessened but the pain of loss never goes away. A friend sent me a booklet about losing a loved one. One thing that it mentioned was that one of the most difficult aspects of death is that you can no longer make new memories with the person who is gone. For me, that is one of the most challenging aspect of losing my dad.

I decided to walk to the cemetery, where I was planning on meeting up with my mom, Roslyn, and my sister, Vivian. I wanted to take pictures of flowers because I love the colors and shapes and smells of flowers. Also, the flowers reminded me of my dad. During his last summer, he often said that he really loved the garden that I had planted. I am grateful that I was able to give him something beautiful to experience when he was so ill. He had cancer. At the time, no one realized how ill he was with cancer. Since then, I have always decorated a luminaria at Relay for Life in his memory, so that, for one night a year, his name would shine brightly, surrounded by so many others.

One of the other names that shines brightly at Relay for Life is Caralyn Reynolds. She is an eleven-year-old cancer survivor. I wrote about her and her sister, Emily, in an article that was published in the Island Dispatch two years ago. Emily had been honored as the honorary caregiver for her sister. Emily and Caralyn are sisters and best friends. Above is their father, Joe. He said that he is grateful that Caralyn was able to enjoy a fun summer this year. Her cancer is not in remission, but the tumor is not growing so her last chemotherapy session was two months ago. Caralyn will start middle school when school opens next week. I was very happy to hear that Caralyn is doing much better.

Caralyn and another young cancer survivor, Luke Gworek, started a campaign to collect kid-friendly band aids for young cancer patients. They were able to collect more than 450 band aids, which were donated for the children. Luke Gworek, who is eight years old, was honored as Relay for Life's Honorary Survivor at this year's event.

I had a distance to go, so I kept walking. Along the side of the road, I saw cattails. They like wet roots so they grow in swamps and in ditches.

I was on my way to visit the cemetery, which is all about monuments and the echo of distant memory. It was good to be surrounded by color and warmth as I walked.

My family has a special fondness for the Rose of Sharon bushes. We had one in our back yard, but, during the 2006 "October Surprise" storm, the bush was broken in half. It still blossomed but the bush looked terrible. Over the years, it deteriorated. It sagged to the ground. Thistles grew around the roots. It was hard to say goodbye to this bush because we had been so fond of it. In June, the bush was removed. I still love the Rose of Sharon bushes and their soft flowers that bloom later in the season.

I realized that I was running late. No more photographs, I thought. Then I saw a patch of sunflowers, and I could not resist. This sunflower is a deep orange, almost a reddish-brown.

This is the sunflower that captivated me the most. It is purple. I have never seen a sunflower of that color. It was very striking.

There were a lot of purple plants with hints of yellow, which is very attractive, as purple and yellow are complementary colors (opposites on the color wheel).

Yellow sunflower.

Very interesting and unusual looking flower.

This may be a whorled tickseed.

At the cemetery, a group was gathered for a funeral. A bagpiper was there. He played three songs, including "Amazing Grace." Having the bagpipe at the cemetery made the experience wonderful. We were all able to express feelings that had eluded us for three years. 

He is not with us anymore, but as long as we keep telling the stories, there will be a part of him that lives. If I had been able to talk to the family at the funeral on August 28th, I would have told them to continue to tell the stories about the one that they loved. Keep the memory alive. Memory is everything. 

flowering happiness

My 365-day photography project is now nearly a month old. I have been able to take bunches of photographs every day. In this update, I will share pictures of flowers that I took, both here in Western New York and during my walk in Wisconsin. I do plan, within the next few days, of posting more about the Wisconsin walk. Today, it will be the flowers.

It is now late summer, and the plants are mature. The late flowers are blooming with dramatic color. The pastels of spring are gone, replaced by vivid greens, purples, oranges, and other colors. 

I was fascinated by this one because it looks like a fried egg, sunny side up!

Here is a wildflower that I found by the side of the road. One of the benefits of walking long distances is having the whole world within touching distance. The colors beckon, and it is possible to stop, take pictures, and feel the petals.

The differences between plants can be subtle, but still quite noticeable.

These aging cone flowers are still quite charming.

This white flower is delightfully delicate.

I can't seem to identify this but its shapes are quite fascinating.

Vivid colors of late autumn.

A bee is busily at work inside a plant.

This cone flower is an unusual and very striking color.

Here is a closeup of Queen Anne's Lace.

Let it shine! Walking in Wisconsin...

On Monday, August 17th, I went to the library for our monthly book club meeting. The book that we discussed was The Snow Child, by Eowyn Ivey. The story is set in Alaska and is based on a Russian folk tale. I drove there in this car!!! (not) Actually, this is my friend's car and she was gracious enough to let me pose in her thoroughly cool car.

After the book club meeting, I got a ride to the train station (thank you, Debbie!), where I waited for a long time for the train, which arrived an hour and a half late. I took a picture of me in the window taking a picture of me. 

After riding in a car, a train, a bus, and another car, I arrived at this place. Shortly after I arrived, a thunderstorm struck! The walkers, who had started their walk on the morning on August 18th, were planning on stopping in this place.

We went to a house where we were treated to a delicious dinner. 

Here is one of the images of the journey, before I got to the thunderstorm and the delicious dinner, organized by Hildegarde. At Union Station in Chicago, I saw this man playing the tuba. His playing was beautiful. It was a real pleasure to listen to him sharing his music.

Another view of the interesting architecture of Union Station.

Day two of the walk. Carrying the big banner.

We walked through the Wisconsin countryside. Lots of cows and corn. Wisconsin is known for its delicious cheeses!

Mmmm. Delicious corn! It is getting ripe and ready to eat at this time of year.

cows are as curious about humans as humans are about cows.

Don and Maya enjoy a happy moment of relaxation.

Don is from New Jersey. He enjoys coming to walks and he likes to prepared delicious breakfasts. He brings happiness and fun to the walks.

A farm stand at a field. Payment is via the honor system.

downtown Lodi.

the lovely sky.

Alice, Maya Bear, and corn.

Frankie and Reetzie, sisters from Des Moines, Iowa, who bring joy to the walk.

One of the fun things of the walk was riding on the ferry across Lake Wisconsin. The ferry has been going on for years and it transports cars, walkers, and bicycles. There is no charge to ride the ferry. 

Another fun thing about the walk has been the animals that we've encountered along the walk. We met cows and horses of all sizes and a few more, shown below.

The horses were fascinated by humans and they came to greet us.

Janet and Masha. Masha was definitely our youngest walker. At three years old, she walked seven miles!

Joy and Masha enjoy lunch together. One of the most wonderful things about the walk was all of the people who came to provide us delicious food, who made sure that we were well fed and happy during our journey.

Frankie's joy is infectious.

We walked past fields, filled with native species of plants.

Here is a llama, who came to pose for me (well, maybe not, but I like to think).

Stone structures always attract me.

Another view of the lake.

Maya Bear explores corn, but not corniness.

The history of the ferry, called the Merrimac Ferry.

One of many barns in various stages of disrepair. It could make an interesting subject for a painting...

Crossing in the ferry.

One of many train tracks that we crossed along the way. I am fascinated by train tracks because, if you look down as far as you can see, you will see a lovely example of one point perspective (all lines leading to one vanishing point).

Tyler lives in an intentional community in northern Missouri. The community is off the grid and uses no electricity. They use bicycles and horses and buggies for traveling. Tyler is able to find all sorts of fruits as he is walking. He also carries the bucket of joy, and his happiness is infectious.

Another view of Tyler.

The walk continues. Today is a rest day. Tomorrow, we continue to walk, and I will continue this story later.